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Oy with the Lorelai quotes already.
I know that I am not alone when I say Gilmore Girls has a special place in my heart. It's a series that I've come back to over and over again, as its endearing characters, bittersweet life lessons, and hilarious dialogue always serves as comfort.
Since the show's quick-witted writing is one of the reasons it's so loveable, I'm breaking down the 48 most iconic lines in all of Gilmore Girls history.
Let's start with Lorelai's legendary coffee-related quips:
1. "This is a jumbo coffee morning. I need coffee in an I.V." - Lorelai Gilmore
2. "Everything in my life has something to do with coffee. I believe in a former life I was coffee." - Lorelai Gilmore
3. "Do you like coffee?" "Only with my oxygen." - Lorelai Gilmore
4. "Coffee, please, and a shot of cynicism." - Lorelai Gilmore
5. "I can't stop drinking the coffee. I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing, walking, and words-putting-into-sentence-doing." - Lorelai Gilmore
6. "If it was physically possible to make love to a hot beverage, this would be the one.” - Lorelai Gilmore
7. "Coffee, coffee, coffee." - Lorelai Gilmore
The WB / Via giphy.com
"Coffee, coffee, coffee" as in Lorelai really needs her coffee, coffee, coffee.
It's no surprise that the most well-known lines are part of some mother-daughter banter:
8. "Oy with the poodles already." - Lorelai & Rory Gilmore
9. "It's a show?" "It's a lifestyle. It's a religion." - Lorelai & Rory Gilmore
The WB / Via tenor.com
They coined the motto of Gilmore Girls fans.
Lorelai's wisdom is also iconic:
10. "I smell snow." - Lorelai Gilmore
11. "I don’t like Mondays, but unfortunately they come around eventually." - Lorelai Gilmore
12. "If you're going to throw your life away, he better have a motorcycle!" - Lorelai Gilmore
13. “I’m afraid that once your heart is involved, it all comes out in moron.” -Lorelai Gilmore
14. "I'm attracted to pie. It doesn't mean I need to date pie." - Lorelai
15. "It’s all any of us wants: to find a nice person to hang out with ‘til we drop dead." - Lorelai Gilmore
16. "If eating cake is wrong, I don't want to be right." - Lorelai Gilmore
17. "Give me a burger, onion rings, and a list of people who killed their parents and got away with it. I need some heroes." - Lorelai Gilmore
18. "You've been Gilmored."
There are also plenty of quotable Rory-isms:
19. "Who cares if I'm pretty if I fail my finals." - Rory Gilmore
20. "A little nervous breakdown can work wonders for a girl." - Rory Gilmore
21. "I live in two worlds. One is a world of books." - Rory Gilmore
22. "I love you, you idiot!" - Rory Gilmore
23. "You jump, I jump, Jack." - Rory Gilmore
24. "Jerk, ass, arrogant, inconsiderate, mindless, frat boy, low life, butt-face miscreant!" - Rory Gilmore
25. "I want to get the healthy glow of someone who goes consistently to the gym without actually having to go, of course." - Kirk Gleason
26. "I'm so damn lonely not even Animal Planet does it for me anymore." - Kirk Gleason
27. "I had an imaginary girlfriend for a while when I was young, but she left me." - Kirk Gleason
Other Stars Hollows residents are also infamous:
28. "People are particularly stupid today. I can't talk anymore." - Michel Gerard
29. "There's a phone call for you, and if I'm to fetch you like a dog, I'd like a cookie and a raise." - Michel Gerard
30. "It's so satisfying to watch people exercise while you eat junk food." - Lane Kim
31. "I thought there was a better chance of all four of the Beatles getting back together than you two ever calming down long enough to get engaged." - Taylor Doose
32. "Gnome kicking says a lot about a man's character." - Babette Dell
33. "Ladies and gentlemen, I am in escrow!" - T.J.
34. "Does anyone here understand that a man has a right not to have his personal life debated in a public forum? I am not Winona Ryder." - Jackson Belleville
35. "That makes me so mad and so sad. I'm smad!" - Sookie St. James
The Gilmore girls' love interests have some memorable lines as well:
37. "It's big, fat, happy sunshine day for me." - Luke Danes
38. "It's getting a little West Side Story here, Dean, and I've got to warn you, my dancing skills are not up to snuff." - Jess Mariano
39. "People can live for a hundred years without living a minute." - Logan Huntzberger
40. "It's Max Medina. Maaaaax Medina." - Max Medina
41. "I just want you to know I'm in. I'm all in." - Luke Danes
Paris Geller is a category all unto her own:
42. "I want to live my life so that I'll be able to read an in-depth biography about myself in later years and not puke." - Paris Geller
43. "No men. Just lots and lots of Chinese food." - Paris Geller
44. "Is it raining?" "No, it's National Baptism Day, tie your tubes, idiot." - Paris Geller
The WB / Via tenor.com
No one was prepared for this comeback.
And last but not least, the savage wit of Emily (and Richard) Gilmore:
45. "Well, if you expect that muffin to fly back to the kitchen by itself you better go get it a cape." - Emily Gilmore
46. "It's not every day I have my girls here for dinner on a day the banks are open." - Emily Gilmore
47. "Only prostitutes have two glasses of wine at lunch!" - Richard Gilmore
The WB / Via tenor.com
Cue Emily's iconic "Well then buy me a boa and drive me to Reno because I am open for business!"
48. "You can use your mother's old golf clubs. They're upstairs gathering dust along with the rest of her potential." - Emily Gilmore
The WB / Via giphy.com
Emily in regards to Lorelai, of course. SAVAGE.
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